Darlings, did this photo get your attention? Good. La Diva knows what her readers are like.
Well, darlings, I was all set to post my SEXY COCKTAIL ENTRY for Lazaro Cooks and Quickies on the Table competition and found that the date has been moved back to September 27. Boo. That means La Diva has to THINK and WRITE about something.
And I haven't posted in over a week.
And I got nuthin'.
La Diva DID make a FABULOUS VIETNAMESE LEMONGRASS CHILE CHICKEN last night but as per usual, DJ Nevah L8 and I inhaled the divine dish before any photos were taken. However, I DID get a funny email from my friend Lady Fifi from Sydney today and I think it is just hilarious. For any of you that have worked in an office, I'm sure you will "relate." Enjoy, darlings!
OFFICE AGGRESSION
I love this one. When I worked at a tradeshow company in L.A. I remember someone walking by and commenting on the production girl from Thailand's lunch saying it "smelled worse than the Santa Monica Pier." In another Los Angeles office, La Diva was also cursed out by an office manager for having a "stinky meal." I was re-heating a yummy Indian fish curry and it was damn tasty. Funny enough, that never happened to me when working in downtown Sydney! Those Sydneysiders are quite familiar with various Asian dishes and and their "pungent" scents and many times the smell of a curry or "ethnic" dish would trigger the appearance of a nose over my compartment divider with the query: What's for lunch today, Diva?
This one, naturally, is my favorite! From what I've read, a "donair" pizza is a Nova Scotian variation on a doner kebab but the sauce is made with condensed milk, sugar and vinegar. (Ick.) You know, La Diva likes the word Soyf*cker so much I just might have to make up an excuse to use it one day!
Ciao for now, darlings!
Don't forget: If you want to learn how to make smashing cocktails and have a smashing time, check out my "small bites, BIG DRINKS" cooking and cocktail classes HERE!
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Very funny post. Who knew that Jesus likes Diet Coke?!
ReplyDeleteGood luck with the cocktail. I am sure it will be ravishingly sexy.
Bwahahahahaha to the one bite out of the cupcake. "Why?" Indeed. Prolly one of those skinny ass bitches who sneaks food on the side. Real women eat the whole thing.
ReplyDeleteThese were pretty funny. The same kind of stuff goes on in my office too. Some times co-workers will bring in snacks to share with everyone in the office. People will take 1/2 a bagel or donut or take the last thing off the plate and leave the dirty, empty plate on the counter or leave dirty dishes in the sink. That's why I hate people.
ReplyDeleteYes, Lazaro, Jesus DOES drink diet coke! haha!
ReplyDeleteMoi, one never knows for sure but in my experience, I found the worst one-bite culprits to be men! (surprise, surprise!)
Buzz, that's why I like you, you are a misanthrope. So am I. (Sometimes!)
bwahahahahahah.I love this. I no longer have employees/co workers who steal food, but I did in my past and I wish I had the guts to have posted ANY of these hysterical messages. Being a crappy cook (me) meant I rarely had ANYONE steal my lunch more than once.
ReplyDeleteThese Anti-Theft Lunch Bags are the answer.
ReplyDeleteThat's the great thing about working at a restaurant-type place - it already smells like food, and most of my coworkers just make their own lunches and dinners at the restaurant and pay for it with an employee discount, so there's rarely any problems with that. ;)
ReplyDeleteAnd I usually bring a banana to munch on so they can't complain anyway. MWAHAHA.
This post was hilarious, though. I sincerely hope I never have to empathize!
cain't stop laughin'.
ReplyDeleteyeah to what Moi said.
This is such a great post! I've had so much fun reading your blog today! Your cocktails are beautiful!
ReplyDeleteI have the info for the next Culinary Smackdown on my site. I hope you're able to participate this month!!
HUGS! btw, how did the wedding job work out??
What a funny post. Those kind of signs did start appearing at my works kitchen, but not anymore as everyone crams their food into the industrial fridge, so its all out of view. Instead food is going rotten in there, so noone wants to steal.
ReplyDeleteOccasionally you will hear of someone complaining about the 'ethnics'. In this case, the ethnic are South Asian people and the smells of their spicy food. The irony is, these are the very same people who will purchase and reheat supermarket ready made versions of Indian and Chinese food for their lunch; or snatch a pakora or samosa from you if you offered. For me the people who really ponk out the kitchen are the moaners first with their bad breath (meow) and then you should see what some of the eat: stinky smoked haddock heated under the grill. Spoiling any one else who wants a plain buttered toast thereafter. The niff just lingers for days!
Ah I am feeling better now. Thank you for sharing :D
Mangocheeks: Smoked haddock under a griller? Ick. I'll take a stinky curry any day!
ReplyDelete